FIRST STAT'S CLASS

SO THE SUMMER SESSION STARTED. HAD THE FIRST CLASS TODAY. THE COURSE IS ENTIRELY DIFFERENT FROM WHAT I HAD EXPECTED. AFTER TWO SEMESTERS OF REAL STRUGGLE, I WAS FINALLY ABLE TO IMPROVE IN CSE COURSES. NOW A STAT COURSE! NOT SURE WHAT I AM DOING. WHY TAKING A STAT COURSE? TO IMPROVE THE LOW GPA. ANOTHER SHORTCUT IN LIFE. MOST OF THEM HAVEN'T REAPED SWEET FRUITS. HOPE THIS ONE DOES.

LATELY FEELING A LITTLE LOW. THE FEAR OF NOT GETTING A JOB AFTER COMPLETING M.S IS PULLING ME DOWN. THEN THE FUNDING SCENE IS ALSO NOT VERY BRIGHT. THOUGHTS OF GOING BACK EMPTY HANDED SENDS SHIVERS DOWN THE SPINE. THE ONLY HOPE IS SOME LUCK COMING MY WAY.

SOMEHOW THE BURDEN OF A POOR ACADEMICS IS SO MUCH THAT I HAVE STOPPED ENJOYING LIFE. STRANGE THOUGHTS COME IN MIND. WISH I COULD JUST DISCONNECT IT AND KEEP IT IN COLD STORAGE!!! I HAVE GIVEN UP ON MYSELF. LEAVING EVERYTHING TO THE GOOD OLD 'GOD'.